Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

Well, it's April, and that means a new fiscal year at work, which also means it's time for an organizational change. It's a yearly event really, only this time, it actually makes sense. In the past, I felt like our group was just floating along without much direction. Now, I think we have someone in charge that will make good things happen, like collaboration between all of the technology groups, standardization, and the use of commercial tools instead of us using our script-fu skills to pull system configs. I think this is a great change for the long run of the group and the company.

Unfortunately for me, I doubt I'll be around long enough to really see all of the change take place. I just can't handle all of the travel. I'm out Monday - Friday this week, M-F next week, M-Thursday next week, and M-F the following week. I like my job and all, but there's no way it's worth missing all of that time with my wife, family, and friends. I don't see how some of the people at work can't understand that. Some of them are missing all sorts of time with their wife and children, and that's time they can never, ever get back. No amount of money can bring that time back, and for me, no amount of money is worth missing those times in life. In a few years, we will likely be ready to have kids, and I'm not waiting until then to quit this job. I want to strengthen my relationship with my wife NOW, so that when we're ready for kids, we will have a good foundation to work from.

Of course, a new job means there has to be one that I can find, one that fits what I'm looking for, and that company has to hire me. So for now, I'm impatiently waiting. I really wish I knew why God was allowing me to go through all of this. I see no point in spending all of this time away from my wife, so it's really hard to understand His plan, and hard to wait patiently for Him to provide the way out. Anyhow, I just hope and pray it comes soon...

This is the USA...we speak English

It occurred to me that I hadn't posted in forver...not that anyone is actually reading this. But anyhow, I just wanted to rant about the issue lost in the immigration debate - the official language of the United States.

A bill recently passed the Senate to make English the "national language." Hmm, seems funny they didn't make it the "official" language, but some idiotic Democrats whined so much that they changed the language to not be so strong. In fact, Democratic senator Harry Reid even called the bill "racist." How do people like this get elected?

Granted, America has long been known as a melting pot, a melding of many nationalities. That's all well and good, and I appreciate that about this country. But think about it just for a 1/2 second and use your brain, Senator Reid. The vast majority do speak English, and *shock*, that's the language this country was founded upon, so it's been around a while. The bill's purpose is to recognize that we do have an official language, and if you're going to live here, you should learn English so you can communicate with your fellow Americans. That's not racist or discriminatory in any way, it's simply common sense.

But forgive me...I'm assuming a senator would have some common sense...silly me.

Work sucks, but "The Office" is great

Due to all of the crappy traveling I do, I get 4 weeks of paid vacation a year. While this sounds nice, it's not all it is cracked up to be. You see, with the way we schedule things, you have to plan your vacation literally at least 6 months in advance it seems. So as I was looking into doing a little family vacation in August...it looks as though I can't go thanks to a job that is already scheduled that week, and they don't care if it messes up any plans I was wanting to make. It's constantly work over everything else in your life, but yet they promote the company as a "family-oriented" company. What company requires so much travel and tells you that your hourly goals for the year are based on a 50-hour work week, yet claims to be so family-friendly? All I need is 10 minutes with an executive and I'd be fired for telling him how sucky the company really is, but I would sure get a lot off of my chest and feel better, not to mention get a really nice severance package.

Thank God for "The Office" to relieve me from the black hole known as work. Tonight's episode was on drug testing, based around a 1/2 a joint found in the Dunder Mifflin parking lot. The best part was Dwight investigating and asking a co-worker of Mexican heritage who immigrated in his childhood, "Have you ever...pooped......a balloon?" Highest of high comedy. I wish there was a Dwight at my place of employment to keep me entertained...

There's no such thing as a free...breast exam

Saw this article online today, and I haven't laughed so hard in quite a while. Even the headline made me laugh hysterically: "Phony doctor gives free breast exams." Yeah, turns out this 76-year-old guy wanted to get a close up of some ladies, so he carried a black bag and proclaimed to be working at a local hospital. Turns out that two 30-something ladies actually let him inside and allowed him to "examine" their breasts...hey, it's not every day a doctor goes door-to-door to offer free exams like that, so they must have thought it was their lucky day!!! According to the article though, the guy got nailed when he went a little too far when he "...asked [one woman] to remove all her clothes and began conducting a purported genital exam without donning rubber gloves." I don't know what's worse - the horny old man coming up with such a ridiculous plan, or the ladies that actually believed him and let him "examine" them. Anyhow, be sure to check out the link, especially for the guy's picture. Reminds me of Steve McCrosky from the movie "Airplane!" when he proclaims, "Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit taking amphetamines."

Oh, and to the two ladies that actually believed this guy, I have some beautiful oceanfront property for sale that I think you would like!

Restaurant Review - Brio Tuscan Grille

Somehow, I've managed to never be sent to Atlanta for work until this week. All I really knew about Atlanta coming in was, well, that the traffic sucks. After confirming the traffic is terrible, my co-worker and I decided to head to a nice restaurant in Buckhead, a very posh area of Atlanta. After driving around for a little bit, we settled on the Brio Tuscan Grille.

I decided to skimp on an appetizer, which turned out to be a good decision since the bread was most excellent. My main course was the Pasta Fra Diavolo with chicken, which is described on the menu as "Penne tossed with wood-grilled chicken or shrimp in a spicy tomato cream sauce." This dish was extremely tasty. The pasta was perfectly cooked, the chicken was in small strips, so it didn't require a lot of work to cut it up, and the spices added a fantastic touch. This was definitely one of the best Italian dishes I've ever had. To finish the meal (and undo the exercise I did last night), I decided on the cheesecake with a carmelized outter layer, drizzled in creme anglaise. Needless to say, this was a welcome sinful pleasure of a dessert. In addition to the fine food, the atmosphere and service was exceptional. If you have a Brio around you, I would highly encourage you to visit sometime.

They Don't Need Those Stinkin' Numbers!!!

OK kiddies, time for a quick financial lesson. Being a security freak (read: enthusiast), I'm constantly paranoid of security threats as I go through everyday life. One of these threats, or more of a bad practice, is the threat of your credit card number being printed on that "Merchant Copy" receipt.

In a best practice scenario, only the last 4 or 5 digits are left shown on a credit card receipt. Some merchants or their employees will argue that they need all of those numbers...Umm, for what, shopping online with my credit card numbers? Think about it, your credit card number, expiration date, and name are printed right there on that receipt. What's to stop someone from taking that receipt if all of the numbers are printed on it and using it for a little shopping spree? This is one of the reasons the Card Verification Value (CVV) code has been introduced, which is that 3-digit number on the back of a credit card. But still, no need for the merchants to have all of those numbers.

And so, without further adieu, if a receipt has all of the numbers printed out on it and you scribble those numbers out while making the ignorant employee upset...direct them to Section 113 (g) (1) of the Fair and Accurate Credit Transactions Act (FACT Act). This section states: "Except as otherwise provided in this subsection, no person that accepts credit cards or debit cards for the transaction of business shall print more than the last 5 digits of the card number or the expiration date upon any receipt provided to the cardholder at the point of the sale or transaction."

So there you have it. You can smile while scratching that credit card number out and help educate those that are not in compliance with the FACT Act. Your credit card numbers will be a little safer, and you'll help educate America's ignorant at the same time! You good citizen you...

Smalltown Ohio, Taco Salads, and a Digital Camera

Well at least I'm not flying this week, but I had a nice long drive this morning to the sleepy mountainside town of Martins Ferry, Ohio - which, I might add, was apparently the first settlement in Ohio, for all of you history buffs out there. Anyhow, we went to lunch today at one of the three restaurants in the town (not kidding, just three). Looking over the lunch menu, we noticed a strange thing on the menu. A taco salad was one of the menu choices, but it had the phrase "In Season" listed by it...needless to say, me and my co-workers were completely puzzled. Since when can a taco salad be in or out of season? Is this just a spring to summer item? Does anyone out there have a clue about this?

This just in...I've joined the new millennium. I just bought my first digital camera this weekend. I said I would wait until I felt I could get a really good camera with all the features I wanted at a decent price, and I think I did that by waiting for the Panasonic LUMIX DMC-TZ1S. From what little time I've had to mess with it so far, I really like it. Stability control for those shaky hands, 10x zoom, 2.5" LCD screen, 5 Megapixels, and a crapload of scenes and other various features. Had to get it at Circuit City for $332 since Best Buy isn't carrying this one yet. Then I was lucky enough to find a 2GB SD card online for $70, then minus a $20 rebate. Lots of space for just a little dough is always a good thing.

If I could just think hard enough

For those so unfortunate to have back problems, such as myself, we're definitely thankful for chiropractic care. Some think it's a bunch of hooey, but I feel much better after every time I go. You can't tell me the pops and cracks and muscle work is fake or something. Anyhow, I ran across this story today and got a pretty good laugh out of it.

"Chiropractor says he adjusts with his mind"

Yep, he's officially nuts. He claims that he has this gift to tell bones and joints with his mind how to move to take the pain away, and presto, no pain! Well sign me up, because you don't even have to make an office visit and waste that precious fuel. He can just think your bones and joints back into place from across the country. Speaking of joints...this guy's been smokin' too much wacky weed. What a nutjob. If he doesn't lose his license for this, then I don't know what else he could do to lose it. Anyhow, enjoy the article...and the laugh.

Welcome to my blog

Ahhh, a blog. I swore I would never have one...well, that's changed, obviously. I don't intend to share my innermost feelings, but I do intend to share my thoughts on all sorts of things, such as news items, sports, information security, religious views, political issues, and anything else I want to comment on. Oh yeah, and the blog title is a shout out to Blazing Saddles, one of my favorite movies. Tuna surprise is one of the items slopped onto Hedley Lamarr as he goes through the kitchen during the fight scene near the end of the movie....and just for the record, I hate tuna. It stinks and it makes me nauseous. Seriously, if I was a criminal and the cops wanted to get me out of the place I was holed up in, no tear gas necessary, just throw in a few cans of tuna and I'm outta there.

Anyhow, I work for one of the top ten CPA and consulting firms in the US as an information security consultant - or as we like to say - a "professional hacker." Anyhow, this job requires me to visit a ton of our clients around the US, and so I see and hear all sorts of interesting things while traveling. For example, I was in a smallish town in Ohio this week for work and drove by a beer and wine drive thru store, whose sign outside sign said "Kids Count!". God bless the Midwest...

Well, that's all for now. Hope this and all posts to follow are interesting, entertaining, and thought-provoking.